I’m just gonna jump right in on this one. The title pretty much sums up my point–pray for your future husband–but I’ll elaborate just a little about why should we pray, how often, and what about.
Well, some may not think it’s very necessary or important to pray for someone you don’t even know yet, but I strongly believe that prayer can make a big difference. And I believe that praying for your future husband is a good and beneficial thing to do, even if you do not know his name. And if you do know his name, then you’d for sure better be praying!
1 Thessalonians 5:17 says rather matter-of-factly, “Pray without ceasing.” We need to be praying people. We need to be close enough to God that we feel comfortable talking to Him about everything, even our love life. I’d say definitely our love life. If God is not the center of our focus, things will get pretty out of proportion, so we need to be able (and willing) to go to Him for help, for strength, for patience, for self-control, for peace… for anything.
So, with that said… Again, WHY should we pray for our future husband? Well, basically because prayer works, and everybody needs it! Jesus, the very Son of God, prayed all the time, and He prayed that God’s will be done in everything. We should also pray for guidance, and for God to guide our future beloved down the right path, and that His will be done. We also need to trust in His perfect timing and have patience. You just don’t need to rush something that important. Be patient; He has it all under control, and He is never too early or late.
How often should we pray? Well, “pray without ceasing” pretty much sounds like “always pray” to me! So, I guess just whenever it crosses our minds (and it should quite often), we should pray!
So… What about? What should we pray about for our future husbands? “I don’t even know his name. How on earth can I possibly know what to pray for?” you might ask. Well, it’s true you may not know what his personal needs are right at this moment, but if you know what kind of Christian man you are looking and waiting for, and are hopefully living up to those standards as well, then you’ve got a pretty good start. If you want to marry a strong Christian who will lead you and your family through the gates of heaven, then you should pray for that type of man. God knows what you need, and He will provide when and how He sees fit.
Here are a few things I think and have heard others say are very important, and we should be praying about these things for the sake of our future husbands (or any men in our lives–brothers, fathers, & friends).
- That he has/will have a strong faith and loves the Lord more than anything or anyone else in the world. We need to pray that, like Paul said of Timothy, he “will be a servant of Christ Jesus, constantly nourished on the words of the faith and of the sound doctrine.” (1 Timothy 4:6) I think this is most important of all, that he put God first in all he does, and if perhaps he is not a Christian yet, we need to pray that he has some good influence(s) in his life that will help him grow close to the Lord. “Draw near to God and He will draw near to you…” (James 4:8a)
- That he will bravely flee youthful lusts and pursue righteousness while fighting for purity. “Bravely flee” may sound like an oxymoron, but it really does take a lot of courage sometimes to turn away from sin. It takes guts to say “no” to some things at times. We need to pray fiercely that our future husbands will have that courage to overcome, and will pursue righteousness, faith, love, peace, and purity. (2 Timothy 2:22; 1 Timothy 5:22)
- That he will have self-discipline “for the purpose of godliness.” “…Discipline yourself for the purpose of godliness; for bodily exercise is only of little profit, but godliness is profitable for all things, since it holds promise for the present life and also for the life to come.” (1 Timothy 4:7b-8) “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, self-control; against such things there is no law.” (Galatians 5:22-23)
- That he will be a confident, unashamed, good example to those around him. “Let no one look down on your youthfulness, but rather in speech, conduct, love, faith and purity, show yourself an example of those who believe.” (1 Timothy 4:12) “You therefore, my son, be strong in the grace that is in you in Christ Jesus. Be diligent to present yourself approved to God as a workman who does not need to be ashamed, accurately handling the word of truth.” (2 Timothy 2:1, 15) “Likewise urge the young men to be sensible; in all things show yourself to be an example of good deeds, with purity in doctrine, dignified, sounds in speech which is beyond reproach, so that the opponent will be put to shame, having nothing bad to say about us.” (Titus 2:6-8)
- That God will grant him wisdom. “How blessed is the man who finds wisdom and the man who gains understanding. The wise will inherit honor, but fools display dishonor.” (Proverbs 3:13, 35)
- That he will trust in the Lord with all his heart. “Trust in the LORD with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding.” (Proverbs 3:5)
- That he will guard his heart with all diligence. “Watch over your heart with all diligence, for from it flow the springs of life.” (Proverbs 4:23)
Other things you may want to pray for is that he have a gentle, understanding spirit (Psalm 112:4b; 1 Timothy 5:1-2), is a hard worker (Proverbs 6:6-11; Timothy 2:15), loves children and desires to be a father (Psalm 127:3-5), is open to learning new things because he knows he doesn’t have all the answers (Psalm 139:23-24; 143:8, 10), is an encourager (1 Thessalonians 5:11), is slow to anger (James 1:19), and has a good sense of humor/a happy spirit (Proverbs 17:22). (Thanks to the young ladies in our book club for helping me out with this!)
For us ladies, we have Proverbs 31 and Titus 2 to look to for the Christian woman/wife example we ought to follow, but what about for the the Christian man/husband? There are many men in the Bible we can look at for guidelines and examples of the kind of man we should look for, but my favorite specific passage describing the righteous man is Psalm 112. “…He is gracious and compassionate and righteous… is gracious and lends; he will conduct his affairs with justice. For he will never be shaken; the righteous will be remembered forever. He will not fear evil tidings; his heart is steadfast, trusting in the LORD. His heart is upheld, he will not fear…” (Psalm 112:4b-8a) This perfectly describes the type of man we should be attracting and praying for.
On a side note, but very importantly, if we want the type of man the Bible describes, then we must diligently strive to become the type of woman that man deserves–the woman he will need someday as a lifelong helpmeet. Remember, the virtuous woman does her husband “good and not evil all the days of her life“ (Proverbs 31: 12), so whether you know him or not right now, you should be honoring your husband already. “An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who shames him is rottenness in his bones.” (Proverbs 12:4)
I realize not everyone will end up being a wife, but God has special plans for each one of us, whether it is marriage or not. Commit your ways to Him, and He will not fail you. He knows what you need even before you do, so just trust Him. “Look at the birds of the air, that they do not sow, nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not worth much more than they? And who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? For the Gentiles eagerly seek all these things; for your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” (Matthew 6:26-27, 32-33) “Trust in the LORD with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.” (Proverbs 3:5-6)
Be the Princess that your beloved Prince deserves. Be the Princess that your beloved King and Father designed you to be.
“First of all, then, I urge that entreaties and prayers, petitions and thanksgivings, be made on behalf of all men.” (1 Timothy 2:1)
“I thank my God always, making mention of you in my prayers. (Philemon 4)
Have a blessed day!