Reviving Chivalry


I work at a quaint little herb shop in my hometown about twice a week. We sell teas, coffee, some organic foods, and a large variety of vitamins and capsuled herbs.

Some days are not very busy, so I have time to read or crochet or write articles for my blog. That’s where I am today, sitting in a cushioned wooden chair, listening to the radio and the constant rumble of traffic outside. Every once in a while someone stops by; usually for something specific or with a question, and other times just out of curiosity. We have some of the nicest customers, most of which are our “regulars” as we call them. I haven’t worked here for very long, but I’ve already met so many wonderful people and made new friends (mostly sweet ladies who call me “Darlin’,” “Baby,” “Sweetheart,” etc.).

This afternoon a very sweet woman, who I’d met once before, came in for one specific item. She had trouble getting around so I closed the shop door behind her and went to the shelf to get her what she needed. We spoke for a while, and let me tell you, that lady is precious. When she was ready to leave, she asked me if it would be any trouble for me to get the door for her again. Of course I didn’t mind at all. We talked some more as she slowly made her way back out into the cold. I asked if she wanted me to go out and open her car door and she happily accepted my offer. She took my arm as she stepped off the curb onto the street and said with a chuckle, “I trust you more than I trust this cane.” When she got into her vehicle she thanked me and told me, “Somebody’s had some good raisin’!” and went on to say that “we old people” need and appreciate all the help they can get.

It’s sad that the elderly–or anyone, really– have to experience such an absence of chivalry these days. It’s not hardly expected anymore! The weaker and feebler people shouldn’t have to do so much on their own when there are others around who can help. I see strong young people who don’t hold the door for the person behind them even when it is so convenient. Even those who are perfectly capable of doing things themselves shouldn’t be without help when around other capable individuals. All of us who can help should look for opportunities to be chivalrous and take those chances whenever they come.

So, this poses a question: Why have the simple acts of chivalry disappeared so?

Is it that we just hate helping others anymore? Hopefully that isn’t the case. Most likely, it is not.

Is it that we have gotten so busy and caught up in our lives (and ourselves in general) that we simply forget to lend a helping hand, especially when it is even a bit out of our way to do so? That very well could be part of the problem.

But I think it has to do with the way my generation has been taught. (Yes, the majority of this impoliteness is the young people.) When the sweet lady complimented me today, she was really complimenting my parents, and all those older than me who have set the Golden Rule example for me to follow. There are far too many from my parents’ generation who have forgotten one thing: that my generation is watching, and whether we want to admit it or not, we are following in their footsteps. The parents who don’t teach politeness/manners/chivalry will most likely have kids that don’t have politeness/manners/chivalry.

So, what’s the solution to this absence of chivalry? We might not be able to convince everyone else that they should be helping others, but we can make a difference in ourselves, by the way we go about doing things.

Open doors. Give up your seat. Speak up and speak respectfully. Say “thank you.”

If we make an effort to be kinder, to think more highly of others than ourselves, and put others’ needs before our own, then we can change the next generation by teaching them by example to do the same.

We have to not only put chivalry “back in style,” we have to make it a habit. A solid, desirable habit that we all have and is expected of us once again.

“Somebody’s had some good raisin’!” Why, yes ma’am, I have, and I’m very thankful for that.

Pass the kindness along, and let this compliment be true of all of us.

Have a blessed day!


Find the old articles at the original site here:


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